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Fight high-flying fears
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June 28, 2000: 9:02 a.m. ET
Courses are available to help travelers overcome the fear of flying
By Staff Writer Rob Lenihan
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NEW YORK (CNNfn) - Whenever "Andrew" had to get on an airplane, his life would go into a tailspin.
The New Jersey resident, who requested anonymity, would become sick when he thought about getting on a jet.
"I would literally get myself ill," he said. "I would think about an upcoming flight and I would get a severe stomach ache, headaches, sweaty palms. It was really terrible. It really compromised my ability to live."
Andrew's case was especially painful because he had relatives in Europe. Just a plane ride away, yes, but for the fearful flier, there's nothing "just" about it.
Andrew is hardly alone. Some 25 million Americans are afraid to fly, and experts believe the real figure is much higher, since many people won't admit their fears.
Down the runway
"It's very common," said Elizabeth Carll, a clinical psychologist in Huntington, N.Y. "Some people refuse to fly and will drive everywhere. If you have international business commitments it's very difficult."
Fearful flyers talk of shame, embarrassment and disappointment. They talk of business opportunities they have missed and vacations they have never taken. And they talk of a bottomless dread that has held them back and isolated them from the rest of the world. 
So do you live your life around train schedules and bus depots? Skip family reunions and beg your boss to send somebody else to the important out-of-town meetings? Or do you get help, the way Andrew did?
Several companies offer consumers courses in managing the fear of flying and all of them claim a high success rate. The programs differ in many ways, but most make use of guided imagery, breathing techniques and common sense information about how an airplane works.
"I'm not as anxious as I once was," Andrew said. "It was just a wonderful experience."
Costs for the courses can vary from $75 to about $400. Several of the programs use booklets and tapes that are mailed to your home. Once you get on a plane, experts say frequent flying will help keep your fears at bay.
"You want to be running toward the roar," said R. Reid Wilson, who designed and served as lead psychologist for American Airlines' first national program for the fearful flier.
First class numbers
Statistically, you are at greater risk driving to the airport than you are when you get on a plane. Carol Stauffer, director of Fly With Confidence, a company that conducts fear of flying seminars, said the average person would have to fly every day for 29,000 years before getting involved in a fatal airline crash.
"You have a better chance of winning the lottery," Stauffer said.
But, of course, if you're afraid to fly, the numbers offer no comfort at all.
"The No.1 reason we see by far is people fear not having any control of the situation," Stauffer said. "You're actually turning your life over to the pilot, the mechanics, the air traffic controllers. You're entrusting your life to all these people."
Stauffer's course, taught with Capt. Gary Arlington, a U.S. Airways pilot, consists of two Saturday sessions and ends with an optional graduation flight to another city.
 Tom Bunn, a retired airline captain who heads SOAR (Seminars on Aeroanxiety Relief) workshops, said fearful fliers are an intelligent bunch.
"They can think of 1,000 things that can go wrong," said Bunn, who runs the company with Lisa Hauptner. "And they're very visually imaginative. They can put a picture in their mind of an airplane disaster in a heartbeat."
Media coverage of air disasters doesn't help. Counselors say while airline wrecks are rare, they dominate newspapers and evening news broadcasts. "People see the gory images on TV, the families grieving," Bunn said. "It's a very emotionally wrenching experience if you have empathy."
Emotional turbulence
Experts say fear of flying is often associated with a major change in your life: a new home, a death in the family, or the birth of a child. Dave Linsley, a retired airline pilot and president of the Pegasus Fear of Flying Foundation, said his program is geared for the highly motivated person who really wants to cure their aviophobia.
"This is not a counseling service or a psychology service," he said. "This is an educational service and we challenge people to do the very best they can."
Linsley's program makes use of breathing techniques to control the emotions and adrenaline-burning isometric exercises that can be done onboard a plane without attracting the attention of other passengers. 
"Most people don't breathe properly," Linsley said. "They breathe too shallow, too quick. If we learn to take deep, slow breaths ... we slow everything down. If you choose to think about something positive you can block negative thoughts."
Knowledge of airplanes is also important. Clients are giving the lowdown on how a plane works, what turbulence is all about and what sort of back-up systems pilots have at their disposal.
"By the time people finish our course," Stauffer said, "they probably know more than almost anybody in the back of the airplane—unless there are some pilots riding back there."
Earn your wings
Need more tips? Wilson, author of "Don't Panic: Taking Control of Anxiety Attacks," and Web master for the site, anxieties.com, had some suggestions for those who fear getting onboard a plane.
· Trust the airlines. No self-help skills will work unless you feel safe on commercial jetliners. Get information about air travel, including pilot training and aircraft construction and maintenance.
· Accept your feelings. Don't fight the feelings of panic—that only makes it worse. When you notice your symptoms, say, "It's OK I feel this way. I expect to be nervous now. I can handle this." Then work on believing these thoughts.
· Handle your worries. Actively choose to stop the negative, "what if ..." thoughts. Reassure yourself with statements such as, "These negative thoughts aren't helping me now. I can let them go."
· Breathe. Try the calming breath, where you exhale, take a deep breath and hold it to the count of three. Exhale slowly, saying the word "relax" under your breath and rest 15 seconds. Let your muscles go limp, loosen your facial muscles and quiet your thoughts. Repeat that process two more times. 
· Relax. Try the 10-second grip to relax your muscles. Grip the arm rests of your seat tightly for about 10 seconds as you breathe. Let go and take a calming breath. Repeat twice. Shift around in your seat; loosen your arms, legs. Close your eyes and focus on your gentle breathing as you invite your body to feel relaxed, warm and heavy for the next half-minute.
· Take supportive action. Reduce your caffeine and sugar intake on the day before and the day of your flight. Get to the airport early and watch planes take off. Greet the captain when you get on board and look into the cockpit. Consider telling the attendants you sometimes get afraid on flights. When you get anxious, review the above suggestions.
If you truly can't bear the thought of getting on board a real airplane, try a virtual one instead. Ken Graap, president and chief executive officer of the Atlanta-based Virtually Better, said his company offers the system to mental health professionals to use with fearful fliers.
Put on the equipment and Graap said you are immersed in an airplane environment—you see inside the cabin, you roll down the runway. All the while a therapist is close by, seeing what you see and speaking with you through a microphone.
Smooth landing
Andrew said his fear of flying got so serious his wife finally went on the Internet and found out about the SOAR program. He ordered the tapes last year and has high praise for the experience.
"It was absolutely fantastic," he said. "The beauty of this thing is that you're taking a course with someone who is a pilot. That in and of itself goes a much longer way than speaking to a psychologist."
When Andrew got on a plane, he admits he was not as comfortable as he would have been in a car, but he wasn't having palpitations either.
"It was a wonderful experience," he said. "That abject fear was gone."
Andrew is planning a trip to Spain in August and he has found the flying course has had an additional benefit.
"It spills over to other aspects of your life," he said. "You just generally feel better about yourself." 
-- Click here to send e-mail to Rob Lenihan
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