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Analyst haiku
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January 4, 2002: 6:02 p.m. ET
Analyst reports/ in seventeen syllables./ But would Basho like?
By David Futrelle
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NEW YORK (CNN/Money) - As someone covering the wild world of tech stocks, I spend a lot of time perusing analyst notes. This week, as I sorted through the latest batch, I was struck again by what a strange -- and strangely poetic -- literary form the analyst note can be. With their staccato rhythms and muscular language, research notes offer highly compressed summaries of analysts' investment theses designed to grab the attention of traders and business reporters alike.
At their worst, research notes are little more than awkward mélanges of business buzzwords and carelessly mixed metaphors, served up alongside the requisite helping of numbers. But sometimes, buried underneath all the clichés, one senses there's a poem trying to get out.
On Wednesday, Merrill Lynch analyst Steven Milunovich warned that IT managers wouldn't start spending until they could "see the whites of the recovery's eyes." I didn't know the recovery had eyes, but it's an interesting image -- and hey, that's what poetic license (if not software licensing) is all about. Two days later, Milunovich's colleague Peter Goldmacher waxed rhapsodic about the prospects of BMC Software, saying the impending release of new networking software could provide a "significant tailwind to BMC's commission hungry sales force." They're hungry; it's windy. And while in real life that might make for something of a messy picnic, as the germ for a poem it's not half bad.
With that in mind, I've taken the liberty of translating some recent research notes into a poetic form that captures the wistful, melancholic mood I find myself in as I look out upon the tech landscape today: the 17-syllable Haiku.
Analyst Henry Blodget raises fourth quarter estimates on Yahoo and eBay just before leaving Merrill Lynch at the end of last year to write a book.
Blodget on way out.
Dumps another load of bull.
Last chance to cheerlead!
Morgan Stanley raises earnings forecasts for Pixar Animation Studios Inc. (PIXR: down $0.22 to $35.12, Research, Estimates)
Monster profits for
Monsters, Inc. Will Pixar be
apple of Steve's eye?
J.P. Morgan upgrades publishing software maker Adobe Systems Inc. (ADBE: up $2.82 to $35.90, Research, Estimates) to "buy."
New versions coming,
customers are chattering.
We like Photoshop!
Salomon Smith Barney upgrades data storage company EMC Corp. (EMC: up $0.26 to $16.85, Research, Estimates) to "buy."
Climbing out of trench
EMC will crawl, walk, run.
Don't get hyper, though.
Lehman Bros. analyst Holly Becker says her estimates for AOL Time Warner Inc. (AOL: up $0.37 to $31.95, Research, Estimates) could be high.
You've got downside! But
AOL Time Warner Inc.
is my boss. Uh oh!
Salomon Smith Barney downgrades XM Satellite Radio Holdings Inc. (XMSR: up $0.55 to $16.14, Research, Estimates) to "neutral" on valuation concerns.
Stock of pricey car
satellite radio is
also not so cheap.
J.P. Morgan says it expects Electronic Data Systems' (EDS: up $2.35 to $66.80, Research, Estimates) to beat fourth-quarter consensus
Negative press, but
fundamentals are OK.
Damn Wall Street Journal!
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