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Not-so-golden arches
McDonald's warns for the first time; poor retail numbers come from Target, BestBuy and Circuit City.
December 17, 2002: 5:47 PM EST
By Andrew Serwer, FORTUNE

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NEW YORK (CNN/Money) - The wind felt cold on the shoulders, and stocks fell on some frosty news from retailers and a fast food giant. Also a little pullback from Monday's big gain. But bear with us. All hope is not lost! There's always Wednesday!

On Tuesday however, the Dow fell 92 to 8,535, while the Naz did better, only dropping 8 to 1,391. Hey watch me, David Clayton-Thomas ("What goes up must come down"...Sheesh! Where is he today? Solo album with Tequila Sunrise came out in '72! Who played with Blood, Sweat, and Tears?), I mean Andy Serwer, on CNN's "American Morning with Paula Zahn," and "Headline News." Read Loose Change to find about the best little insurance stock you never heard of! Here's wazzup:

STOCKYARD Well, the big stories of the day: Mixed economic picture, and bad news from McDonald's (see below). Also, while that nasty story about credit cards in Barron's over the weekend didn't ding Target, a poor sales report did! Tar-jay said sales were at the low end of forecast. Tarj doesn't usually deliver low-end. The stock fell $2.04 to $29.76 (comin' down to my buyin' range?)

HP and SBC kept on rallying...BestBuy and Circuit looked pretty lousy, too!...

Gold is now at $343 (I know, who gives a rat's salad bowl?) That's a five and half year high. Well it's a sign o' the times! The White House came out and defended the dollar -- are you taking notes, John Snow?

Hey, the Chinese bought the Dirt Devil! Royal Appliance Manufacturing, the pride of Glenwillow, OH! Hey, so Cadbury bought Adams (gum) from Pfizer for $4.2 billion. Can you name the Adams products? Here are some biggies: Bubblicious, Celestial Seasonings (hey, that ain't gum!), Certs, Chiclets, Clorets, Dentyne, Freshen-up, Halls, and Trident...

And if I said it once, I've said it a 1,000 times: "It's Hamtaro time!"...Hey, I'm going on VH-1 soon. Finally! A channel you watch! Stay tuned...

NOT-SO-GOLDEN-ARCHES McDonald's posts its first quarterly loss ever. EVER! Now, granted it was because of a restructuring charge, but still, things continue to tumble down for Ronald and Co. It's ironic that this occurred on a day that word came out the company was moving into Italian food!

Here's the bottom line: People are eating less hamburgers. U.S. is saturated. Overseas is dicey. Same store sales this year are down 1.6 percent. The discounting program is not having its desired effect. Earnings have fallen in 7 of 8 quarters. Its U.S. market share has fallen from 15.7 in 1999 to 15.2 today. Stock fell $1.47 to $15.91, an eight year low. New CEO Jim Cantalupo has his hands full.

SIR CHARLES BARKLEY Ran into him at CNN today. He was talking his new book -- which I might actually read. Looking good, Chaz was friendly, and big! Spoke with for a while about the markets. "I don't buy stocks," he told me. "I missed the whole 'up' thing and the 'down' thing, too. My financial guy and me are just conservative." Does that mean bonds? "Yes, bonds and cash. I'm into, you know, just preserving what I have. I'm not looking to strike it rich. You know that doesn't happen very often, not too many of those," he says laughing. No sign of Kenny (the jet) Smith. Bet he owned CMGI all the way down...(Ernie = knucklehead!)

"You make me so very happy. I'm so glad you came into my life"...(More David Clayton-Thomas!)

CHAINSAW What's your favorite brand? I'm a Husqvarna guy. The Swedish swinger! What about you?

Loose change

Kmart got delisted Na na na, na na na, hey, hey...(Sooo toast.)...

Willis Group Holdings (NYSE: WSH (WSH: Research, Estimates)), a global insurance broker, is a little stock I wish I owned. Began trading in June of '01 around $16. Now sells for about $30. Anyone know 'em?

Have you read Susan Antilla's "Tales From The Boom-Boom Room: Women vs. Wall Street" Looks pretty relevant today. A big multi-million settlement today. It ain't over, Susan says. And she's right!

Here's one reader's take on some of the best beers in the U.S. of A: "Albert Damm Bitter, Coopersmith's Brewpub, Fort Collins, Colo. -- quite possibly the best tap beer sold in America. Pumped at cellar temperature by an authentic English beer engine, this exceedingly delicious beverage has practically no carbonation. And then there's Schell's Pils, August Schell Brewing Company, New Ulm, Minn. -- the best bottled beer produced in America." -- Bob" Thanks, Bob!

Ozzy Osbourne is going to replace Britney in Pepsi Super Bowl ads. Paula Zahn wants to know, "What is the world coming to?"

Ron Artest is the new Rodman? No way! Still, I like Artest. Can you believe the Knicks passed on Artest (remember Fredric Weiss?) and traded Hilario (scored 20 last night!) I can believe it, they are sooo dumb!


Andrew Serwer is editor-at-large of Fortune magazine.

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Most stock quote data provided by BATS. Market indices are shown in real time, except for the DJIA, which is delayed by two minutes. All times are ET. Disclaimer. Morningstar: © 2018 Morningstar, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Factset: FactSet Research Systems Inc. 2018. All rights reserved. Chicago Mercantile Association: Certain market data is the property of Chicago Mercantile Exchange Inc. and its licensors. All rights reserved. Dow Jones: The Dow Jones branded indices are proprietary to and are calculated, distributed and marketed by DJI Opco, a subsidiary of S&P Dow Jones Indices LLC and have been licensed for use to S&P Opco, LLC and CNN. Standard & Poor's and S&P are registered trademarks of Standard & Poor's Financial Services LLC and Dow Jones is a registered trademark of Dow Jones Trademark Holdings LLC. All content of the Dow Jones branded indices © S&P Dow Jones Indices LLC 2018 and/or its affiliates.