Networking Lessons According to an ex-Goldman partner, women need to get a lot better at the quid pro quo.
By Connie Duckworth; Bethany McLean

(FORTUNE Magazine) – Back in 1990, Connie Duckworth, now 49, became one of the first women partners at investment-banking firm Goldman Sachs--and the very first one from the most traditionally male part of the business: sales and trading. She went on to run the firm's municipal bond department before leaving in 2001 to work with women entrepreneurs and to co-write The Old Girl's Network: Insider Advice for Women Building Businesses in a Man's World. Duckworth recently discussed networking and mentoring with senior writer Bethany McLean.

IT'S TEMPTING TO THINK OF A WALL STREET TRADING FLOOR AS NUMBERS-DRIVEN RATHER THAN RELATIONSHIP-DRIVEN. YET YOU SAY NETWORKING WAS CRITICAL TO YOUR CAREER.

The overarching lesson I learned early on at Goldman is that networking is the glue of all business--it's the foundation of how business gets done. Your relationships drive how successful you'll be. I had guidance from very good mentors, all of whom were men. There were no women at the time.

SOME WOMEN HAVE TROUBLE NETWORKING AS EFFECTIVELY AS MEN. WHY?

Women are more instinctively collaborative, but men in business instinctively understand the quid pro quo--you help me, I'll help you. Women need to understand that you can ask someone for something and they'll ask for something back, and that's a norm and an expectation, not an infringement on a personal relationship. It's not personal. It's business.

ANY OTHER TIPS?

I advise younger people that you have two sets of clients: internal colleagues and bosses and your external client base. You develop those relationships through active listening and a collaborative style, which helps make others want to work with you.

People want to work with others who have vision--people who are doing more than just executing. You have to work hard to develop your expertise and reputation as someone who is a "go-to" person. Circulate, get out, get connected.

ARE WOMEN EXECUTIVES DOING A GOOD ENOUGH JOB MENTORING OTHER WOMEN?

Every senior woman I know devotes an immense amount of time to mentoring. There are totally disproportionate expectations for senior women vs. senior men. Senior men may mentor a cadre of guys, but if there are only one or two senior women, they're mentoring every woman in the company. As a result, senior women often do two jobs. They have a regular job and then a whole shadow job as a role model and mentor to impossible numbers of people.

IS THERE ANY POINT AT WHICH YOU CAN EASE UP ON NETWORKING?

The one constant is change, and the pace of change is so accelerated today. Just when you build really strong relationships, someone gets promoted or transferred, and you have to start over. So you can never stop networking.