(FORTUNE Magazine) – This earnings season, when yet another conference call featuring obsequious analysts, loathsome executives, and mangled business jargon makes you want to slam down the phone in agony, play our earnings bingo instead! Inspired by the folks at ABN Amro, who dreamed up a similar game, our Bingo requires only that you hear a tired phrase and stamp it out. Get five in a row and win!

B

"Great quarter, guys."

"Unseasonably warm/cold weather"

"To quote The Donald, 'You're fired!'"

"Our founder's conviction was a drag on this quarter's earnings."

"Weak dollar"

I

"Merger-related costs"

Any mention of Iraqi supply contracts

"Offshoring"

Any reference to avian flu

"What we're doing here is really positioning ourselves for 2005."

N

"Some housekeeping items"

"I'll defer to my CFO on that one."

FREE SPACE

"24/7"

"Compensation was reasonable."

G

"Restatement"

"Excluding one-time charges..."

"The Patriot Act has reduced our customer base."

"We're willing to trade profit for market share."

"We are cooperating fully with the SEC."

O

"Difficult" (as in year, quarter, decade, etc.)

Any baseball/football/basketball analogy

"We have not participated in market-timing practices."

"Deploy excess capital."