(MONEY Magazine) – ''The proposal is the man's moment,'' says George Turner, 26, ''and I didn't want it to be ho-hum.'' It wasn't. ''I arrived at Rita's apartment with a long-stemmed red rose in a white box,'' he remembers. ''When she took out the rose, she found the engagement ring, a gold band with seven marquise diamonds, tied to its stem. She burst out crying and laughing and got so carried away that I thought I'd have to call 911.'' Fortunately for the lanky, six-foot, three-inch Minneapolis real estate salesman, Rita Clemens, 25, recovered enough to say yes on that evening last November. Now the pair are planning a Roman Catholic wedding for August and a 400-guest reception that George says ''will make Charles and Di's look Mickey Mouse.'' The upcoming event is not all they are thinking about, however. Rita, a sales manager, may spend her lunch hour shopping for a wedding dress, but when she meets George for dinner, he often brings up more mundane matters that his married fellow employees have suggested the couple discuss. Among the topics: consolidating property and bank accounts, checking insurance coverage and company benefits, buying a house and even writing wills. These days, that kind of prenuptial planning is nearly mandatory for the two-income couples who make up 45% of all marriages. In George and Rita's case, financial forethought is an absolute must, because both have variable incomes. George, who has sold industrial real estate at Coldwell Banker since 1986, is paid solely on commission: on sales he closes he gets 3% of the first $500,000 in revenues and 2 1/2% for anything over that amount. Last year he chalked up a respectable $35,000, yet early this year he glumly reported, ''I haven't made a dime in six weeks.'' He notes that his specialty involves leasing or selling warehouses and manufacturing units -- ''deals that can cost millions of dollars,'' he says, ''so they're not made every day.'' Yet, if some sales he has cooking go through, he will make $40,000 to $50,000 this year. Then again, he may not. During his dry spells, he and Rita will have to rely on her pay from Collins Communications Systems, a 90-person St. Paul firm that sells computerized business phones. Rita, who was made head of a five-person marketing force last October after only one year as a company sales rep, calls Collins ''a wonderful firm -- imagine becoming a sales manager at 24.'' She earns $27,500 annually in base pay, plus 1% of her reps' sales. But despite hoping that her income this year will hit $35,000, she is counting on only her salary. Such prudence is new for a high-spirited, gregarious couple who last year spent $4,550 on vacations and recreation, including trips to Florida, camping and sailing in northern Minnesota and football-game weekends in Chicago. Before the showers and engagement parties started filling their time, Rita and George tried estimating their joint monthly living expenses. But they gave up after figuring that rent, utilities, car costs and charge-card payments would top $2,000, even before they got to food and drink. ''We'll need another $2,000 just for that,'' jokes George. Now they are making a more serious effort to decide which assets and accounts should be kept in whose name. Each has $3,000 in bank savings and another $500 in checking. George also has $4,000 equity in an $85,000 St. Paul rental duplex that he and two friends bought as an investment a year ago. The $1,075-a-month rent does not cover the duplex's carrying costs, but George came out $850 ahead after taxes for 1987 because he could claim $3,200 in depreciation write-offs against his income. Since his employer does not offer pensions, George is building his own nest egg. He has contributed $250 to an investment club started by some friends / that he joined late last year. The money went into over-the-counter shares of Selectronics, a consumer electronics company that the club invested in. Early in 1988 he also began putting 10% of his earnings into a 40l(k) savings plan at work. The cash has been apportioned with after-the-crash conservatism: 60% in a bond mutual fund, 30% in an equity income fund and 10% in a growth-stock fund. To spare himself the cost of a car down payment, George leases his three- month-old Oldsmobile Delta 88 for $265 a month. Coldwell Banker does not reimburse him for that amount, so George deducts 65% of it as a personal business expense. There will be an auto in the family, however, since Rita is paying off her car, a 1985 Toyota Corolla on which she still owes $7,000. She also brings to the union $30,000 in personal property, much of it jewelry from her parents. All but the jewelry is insured under Rita's tenants policy, which costs $150 a year, and she and George each have similar $25,000 term life insurance policies and medical coverage through their jobs. But George lacks disability insurance and is considering buying a group plan at work that would cost $10 a month. It would replace 60% of his income up to $2,500 a month for life. Behind these concerns looms the larger question of when the couple should buy a home. George is wary of taking on the burden too early. ''We don't know what kind of house we want, but it would probably cost at least $80,000,'' he says. ''So we'd need $8,000 to put down, and then we'd owe $1,000 a month for years and years.'' He finds the prospect of debt all the more worrisome because he does not want to turn to his family for help. His father manages a bank in St. Paul, where George grew up. George's mother, a homemaker, died of cancer six years ago, leaving three daughters as well as George. Two of the girls are still in college and, observes George: ''Dad could easily lend Rita and me a down payment, but I wouldn't feel comfortable asking him to while he has my sisters to put through school.'' The Turners' college bills began with George himself, who as the eldest earned a degree in history from the University of Minnesota in December 1983. After graduating, he applied to work at Coldwell Banker out of a fascination with real estate that he had first felt as a boy listening to talk about the industry from an agent friend of his father's. George waited nine months to be hired, surviving by living at home and working as a window salesman and as an attendant at a home for the retarded. His starting salary at Coldwell: only $13,200. ''I had two suits, four shirts and one pair of shoes,'' he recalls, ''and going out meant a trip to the pub with the guys for a few beers.'' One such expedition, on a spring evening in 1986, took him to a German-style bar called Gluek's, where he met Rita Clemens when she and some friends dropped in for the happy hour, which draws a yuppie crowd. While neither recognized the other, it developed that the couple had known each other vaguely as high school students at affiliated parochial schools. Rita had gone on to St. Mary's College in Notre Dame, Ind., graduating in 1985 with a degree in business administration. At the time they met, she was an auditor with the accounting firm Peat Marwick Mitchell, but she wasn't enjoying the job because of the cold reception she received when she arrived to audit companies. ''On the other hand,'' she recalls, ''George was real enthusiastic about his work, and talking to him I got interested in trying sales.'' No romantic sparks flew, though, and in parting the two simply fell back on the networking ritual of exchanging business cards. In the fall, after Rita had joined Collins Communications, she called George, looking for leads on who might be needing phones. He couldn't help, since he was in industrial real estate, but the chat led to a couple of friendly dates. Then at Christmas, George invited her to Coldwell Banker's office party at the elegant Minikahda Club. ''That was the turning point,'' reports Rita. ''It was a glittery, dress-up dinner dance, and there was something about the festive atmosphere and the fact that he felt comfortable bringing me to meet the people he worked with that made me suddenly realize I really liked him.'' By the spring of 1987 the two were talking marriage, ''though I didn't know when he'd ask,'' says Rita. He ended her uncertainty two months after giving up his salary for the potentially more lucrative post of salesman on commissions. Since their engagement five months ago, George has lived in a $260-a-month, one-bedroom furnished flat near the apartment Rita shares with a roommate in Crocus Hill, a funky St. Paul neighborhood favored by young career people. Through a newspaper ad, he and Rita found a $595-a-month, two-bedroom apartment in the area, which she has leased and will move into soon. The place will serve as their first home and will be furnished with her household goods -- a few lamps and tables that George calls ''garage-sale stuff'' -- plus the stockroom of gifts that they stand to get from their 400 wedding guests. Rather than buy anything more, they plan to begin saving by putting aside Rita's weekly paychecks and trying to live on George's earnings alone. Eventually they hope to have enough funds for a house down payment, but they have also discussed cashing in George's duplex equity to make the payment on a condo. George is reluctant to take that step, however, partly because he and his two partners hope to make more investments when they can afford them, and partly, he says, ''because the partnership is a good way to sustain our friendship.''

Instead, he would like Rita to raise some extra money by returning to the part-time modeling she did in local hairdressing shows as a teenager. Now a statuesque five feet, 10 inches, she occasionally does runway work for department stores, earning $25 or $30 a show. George is urging her to apply to Minneapolis' two largest modeling agencies for photographic assignments, but since her job promotion, she has not been able to arrange flexible enough hours to pursue a second career. But they both expect that she will do part- time modeling after they have children. ''We won't be starting a family for a few years,'' notes Rita, ''but once we have one we'll probably always need two incomes.'' For now, however, Rita and George are focusing on their wedding, which will be held at the Church of the Nativity of Our Lord in St. Paul, where George attended elementary school. The Turner family's old friend Father Patrick Lannan will preside, and the ceremony will be accompanied by live classical music. George's sisters will be among Rita's five bridesmaids, and Rita's only sibling, an older brother, will be one of George's attendants. The International Market Square in downtown Minneapolis, a renovated factory that is now a popular hall for large affairs, has been booked for the postnuptial party, which will feature an open bar, cocktail-hour pianist, sit- down dinner with a choice of entrees and dance music by the Sevilles, the same 10-piece band that played at Coldwell Banker's Christmas party. Rita's father, a semiretired steel company executive, will pick up the tab, and though the family declines to say what it will be, educated estimates put the figure at $20,000 or more. Afterward, the newlyweds will honeymoon either in San Francisco or on the island of Bermuda. - To ease the financial load on her parents, Rita wants to pay for her own dress. She also plans to buy her bridesmaids their shoes as her gift to them. George will have to buy presents for the five groomsmen and four ushers -- ''Rita will tell me what to get,'' he says with an affectionate grin. He has no idea what she will suggest, and the couple declined to discuss how much they think their total wedding expense will be. Whatever the cost, it will now be somewhat easier to bear. In spite of a slow start this year that forced him to live on savings for a month and a half at the end of February, George confided: ''I made a couple of sales this week that brought me $10,000. Hopefully, 1988 will be good to me.''

BOX: Her Bottom Line

Gifts accounted for the third largest expense that Rita Clemens had in 1987, and the second largest for George Turner (see page 109). ''We were invited to 10 weddings over the year,'' explains Rita, ''and in most cases to showers for the couple before the wedding.'' In addition, she didn't neglect her fiance, whom she presented with a $300 Gucci watch after they became engaged.

INCOME Earnings $26,000 Withdrawal from savings 500 Tax refunds 483 Interest 55 Total $27,038

OUTGO Taxes $6,212 Clothes 3,175 Gifts 3,000 Rent 2,678 Loan repayments 2,660 Savings 2,400 Meals at home 1,825 Recreation 1,100 Vacations 1,075 Car expenses 1,000 Furniture 800 Utilities 350 Medical expenses 300 Contributions 250 Tenants insurance 150 Miscellaneous 63 Total $27,038

ASSETS Personal property $30,000 1985 Toyota Corolla 5,800 Savings account 3,000 Checking account 500 Total $39,300

LIABILITIES Car loan $7,000 Credit-card balance 500 Total $7,500

NET WORTH ^ Total $31,800

BOX: His Bottom Line

By late November, George Turner was burdened with a $26,000 mortgage debt on his duplex and a $500 credit-card liability. Still, when he decided to buy Rita's engagement ring, he took out a personal loan for $3,000 at 10.75%. The new loan reduced his net worth at year-end to a mere $9,750.

INCOME Earnings $35,000 Loan 3,000 Tax refunds 450 Interest 310 Total $38,760

OUTGO

Taxes $13,403 Gifts and engagement ring 4,000 Food 3,650 Investments 3,475 Car and business expenses 3,105 Savings 3,000 Rent 2,600 Recreation 1,200 Vacations 1,175 Miscellaneous 1,150 Clothes 1,000 Contributions, dues 325 Loan repayment 260 Medical expense 210 Utilities 157 Engagement ring insurance 50 Total $38,760

ASSETS

Share of duplex market value $30,000 Personal property 5,000 Savings 3,000 Checking account 500 Investment club contribution 250 Total $38,750

LIABILITIES

Share of duplex mortgage $26,000 Loan 2,500 Credit-card balance 500 Total $29,000

NET WORTH

Total $9,750

BOX: The Advice Learn to live together first

-- THE PROBLEMS How to merge a young couple's assets, obligations and income, and when to buy the first home.

-- THE SOLUTIONS 1. Consolidate assets and debt selectively. 2. Use George's earnings to build a reserve. 3. Don't buy until you can afford the house you want.

When MONEY brought George Turner and Rita Clemens together with certified financial planners Robert Steffen and Patrick Farley in St. Paul, the advisers gave the couple these suggestions: Blending assets and liabilities. The couple should combine their $3,000 savings accounts and switch into a bank money market paying 5.25%, a quarter of a point more than their passbook savings. They should also consolidate checking accounts to avoid paying double fees. But Rita's car loan and credit card should be in her name so she can maintain her credit rating. As for George, he should keep his duplex investment separate, in line with the original intent of the written agreement among the partners. But he should have the partnership buy three term life insurance policies covering each member for an amount equal to his share of the equity. That way, if George died, his benefit would provide the funds his partners would need to buy out Rita. Income allocation. The couple should put building a cash reserve ahead of saving for retirement. George's commissions plus half of what he is contributing to his 401(k) should be set aside to build that reserve. The advisers suggested keeping the money in money-market funds or Treasury bills for liquidity. They disagreed, though, on how large the reserve should be. Farley recommended that it cover one year's living expenses, while Steffen thought five months would be sufficient if the couple got further protection against emergencies by securing lines of credit at their bank. For immunity from financial drain in the event that George becomes disabled, he should first buy private long-term disability insurance equal to 60% of his gross annual income; the policy should have a cost-of-living rider as an inflation hedge. An individual policy from Maccabees Mutual in Southfield, Mich. would cost a relatively low $750 a year -- which is still $630 more than Coldwell Banker's group plan. But the policy would offer a more liberal definition of disability, plus tax-free benefits -- and George would remain insured if he changed jobs. Afterward, he can enter his company's plan for extra coverage. Home ownership. George should not cash in his duplex equity to buy a condo because the duplex looks to be the better investment in the Twin Cities. Besides, owning a duplex reduces his taxes more, since he could deduct only the mortgage payments on a condo, not the $80 to $100 monthly association fees. Steffen also cautioned the couple to avoid purchasing the kind of house they can afford now -- an inexpensive starter home in a neighborhood where property values are not going up. He says such homes are proving to be mistakes for many newlyweds in an era when low inflation and appreciation rates make it hard to trade up later on. Instead, George and Rita should continue renting until their reserve allows them to afford their dream house. Even more important, they need to live together long enough to work out their life style, a crucial factor in determining the kind of home best for them. In fact, both advisers counseled the couple to remember that the first year of marriage calls for mutual accommodations that can be critical to future happiness. Rather than confronting long-term financial issues, they should give priority to simply learning to be comfortable with each other.

George and Rita reacted most positively to the advice that they wait to buy a house. Said Rita: ''This wedding and all we have to get through in the next six months is very stressful. Why should we be worrying about home ownership too?''