(MONEY Magazine) – Nightly TV news images of needy people including the 2 million Rwandan refugees may leave you wanting to help but unsure of how to do that effectively. Each year Money helps readers to size up charities in our December issue by ranking the 100 largest groups on how efficiently they spend their money. That's fine as a statistical analysis. But to go beyond the numbers, Money and the National Charities Information Bureau (NCIB), a respected private watchdog group, recently sent out a survey asking the chief executives of 111 leading charities to rate their peers anonymously on their effectiveness, quality of management, integrity in fund raising and flexibility. In the survey, we also offered an optional comments section to provide more specific information -- positive or negative -- about others in their group. We assumed that charity officials would be familiar with outfits that did similar work and willing to provide you with an insiders' perspective so you could give your money away with more confidence that it would be spent well. In turn, we believed that elevated confidence might induce some people to donate more. A classic win-win. A fine theory. But for the most part, the charity executives clammed up. Only 41 -- or 37% -- answered our survey. Many charity spokesmen said they feared the questionnaire would breed only negative comments or outright lies from organizations competing for the same donor dollars. "We see the optional comments section as a bulletin board for rumor, innuendo, bias and a tool to be used for competitive advantage," wrote Kelly Browning, executive vice president of the American Institute for Cancer Research. Says NCIB president James Bausch: "I'm disappointed that some viewed this as a chance to badmouth one another." Most charity leaders who didn't answer the survey told us they felt unqualified to make informed judgments about their peers. If that's the truth, then how can any ordinary person evaluate a charity before sending a donation? We're not sure we have the whole answer. Yet, with the help of watchdogs, regulators and charity officials, MONEY offers these steps to help you decide whether a charity is worth your hard-earned bucks: -- Ask charity staffers pointed questions about the work their groups have performed. Says Jean Adams, executive director of the Charities Review Council of Minnesota, a private watchdog organization: "If they can't spell out their results, that's a red flag." Also, inquire about how much of any charity's annual income is spent on programs. Less than 65% is low. Be sure a charity with a smaller percentage can explain it satisfactorily. More than 30 major relief groups are now helping in Rwanda, but the three that spent the highest percent of their income on programs -- at least 94% -- from 1990 to 1992 are International Rescue Committee (212-551-3000), MAP International (800-225-8550) and Catholic Relief Services (800-736-3467). -- Get an impartial opinion about the charity from at least one watchdog agency. The NCIB (19 Union Square West, New York, N.Y. 10003) reports on whether 400 of the nation's biggest charities meet its standards in its quarterly Wise Giving Guide (free with a self-addressed stamped envelope). Similarly, the Philanthropic Advisory Service of the Council of Better Business Bureaus, or CBBB (4200 Wilson Blvd., Arlington, Va. 22203), covers 300 groups and publishes its findings in its bimonthly guide Give, But Give Wisely (the October edition will be free if you send a self-addressed stamped envelope). -- For a more detailed analysis of how a charity spends money, request its annual tax return, known as Form 990. The IRS has made the 990 more useful, requiring, for instance, that charities reveal how much of their fund-raising materials they consider to be program expenses. Since a charity must break down its program spending by categories such as public education, patient services or research in the 990, you can see whether the charity is doing the type of work it describes in its name or solicitations. "If a group says it's a research organization, I want to see that a substantial amount of money was spent on research," says Steven Arter, president of the National Association of State Charity Officials. "Numbers do tell a story."