(MONEY Magazine) – Pop quiz for couples: the front-page, multimillion-dollar divorce between GE Capital CEO Gary Wendt and longtime wife Lorna proves that a) stay-at-home spouses of corporate big shots need to fight for their rights; b) smart executives should tie up most of their net worth in stock options; or c) you should move into, or out of, a community property state now.

Your answer probably depends on whose side you're on. Many of this country's 13.2 million stay-at-home spouses cheered for Lorna Wendt, 54, who demanded half of what she estimates is a $100 million fortune on the ground that she'd been an equal partner in a 32-year union. "As a wife and mother, I worked hard," she told MONEY recently. The judge, however, awarded her only about 20% of that amount--some $20 million, including half of the couple's stocks, bonds and cash (her take: $7.9 million), their Connecticut and Florida homes ($2.8 million) and alimony ($252,000 annually). Gary Wendt, 55, keeps the company-paid pension plan, all stock options and performance-based deferred compensation. As MONEY went to press, both sides were still filing motions to reargue certain details of the settlement.

Legal scholars say that though Wendt vs. Wendt set no hearth-shaking precedents, it did illuminate some important points for one-career couples on the road to Splitsville, as well as for the many workers now receiving options and deferred-compensation packages. Some lessons:

--Just because the Wendts didn't go fifty-fifty, don't assume a court won't make you split it down the middle. Courts don't usually divide assets equally for couples who have more than $10 million, like the Wendts. Judges call this the "enough is enough" rule: They figure a few million bucks is enough for any spouse. But if you're worth somewhat less, courts are likely to split total assets equally. To gain some flexibility, try to reach a fair financial settlement out of court. "Settlements allow you to negotiate putting the kids through college, adjusting for inflation and buying out a spouse from a business," says Jeff Atkinson, professor at DePaul University in Chicago and an expert in divorce law. "Courts might order everything sold and split down the middle."

--Don't assume retirement and deferred-compensation packages belong solely to the spouse who earned them. True, Gary Wendt wound up with most of his company stock and long-term performance awards. But that's because the judge felt the investments, real estate and fat alimony his ex got were plenty to keep her off the streets in old age. If a couple own few assets other than one spouse's 401(k) and stock options earned during the marriage, a judge will likely dole out at least some of it to the other spouse. Many courts in so-called equitable-distribution states (see the box opposite for details) award most of the money in a retirement plan to the spouse who earned it, as long as there are other assets to divide. Community property states, by contrast, tend to order a fifty-fifty split of such plans.

Be sure to learn the true value of deferred-compensation packages before you give them up. That's easier said than done, of course. Options represent the right to buy stock at a discount some years in the future, meaning they could be hugely valuable if the stock blossoms. Experts suggest estimating their value by taking the shares at their current price, then subtracting taxes that would be owed and the amount you'd pay to buy the options.

--Be aware that how well you fare in divorce depends on which state you live in. If you helped put hubby through school as Lorna Wendt did, for example, in New Jersey you may be compensated with "reimbursement alimony" equal to the amount you paid. In Missouri, homemaker contributions in a long marriage may be considered equal to that of the working spouse. In order to learn your rights where you live, call your state or local bar association or check the Family Law Advisor Website (www.divorcenet.com).

--Focus on your family finances. Don't be the spouse who's allergic to Quicken. If you're clueless about your net worth or how much you need to maintain a household, you may settle for less than you deserve. "Don't wait for death or divorce," cautions Lorna Wendt. "It's your money, it's your tax return--you've got to know about it."