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Tis the season to be tipping
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December 3, 2001: 3:45 p.m. ET
The ins and outs of those annual holiday tips.
By Annelena Lobb
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NEW YORK (CNN/Money) - Figuring out whom to tip and how much is tough enough when it's people you tip every day. Should that waiter get 20 percent or just 15? But at this time of the year you find yourself thinking about the mailman. Or the doorman for your apartment building. Or the person who cuts your lawn. Should you tip them? How much? What for?
Whom to tip
The people you need to tip depends on what kind of services you typically use, said Peggy Post, an author and etiquette advisor at the Emily Post Institute.
"You can sit down and make a list of the people you need to tip by going through your average day, week, and month -- and the service people who help you regularly will stand out," Post said. "Everyone's list will be different. Someone who works from home, for example, might have a regular overnight delivery person who they like and want to tip."
After you've made a list and checked it twice, consider your budget. Purse-strings may be tight during this year's economic downturn. But holiday tips are a must unless you absolutely cannot afford them, said Hilka Klinkenberg, a consultant at New York City-based Etiquette International.
"It's very important to consider your budget, but if you can give, it's unacceptable to shirk tips to people who have provided you with service all year," Klinkenberg said.
According to the Emily Post Institute, the amount you give depends on other factors: the quality of service, how long you've had a relationship with that person, what's typical in your part of the county, and what's typical for your neighborhood.
Another extremely important factor, Klinkenberg said, is whether you've been tipping all year -- if you give your doorman money every time he helps you with groceries, the tip you give during the holiday season might be smaller than if you never tip.
To get an idea of how much people in different parts of the country tip for various services, take a look at the chart below from Real Simple magazine.(Real Simple and CNN/Money are both owned by AOL Time Warner.)
Cash or goods?
Whether you give cash or a gift depends on the recipient, according to Post. "For someone like a teacher, babysitter or day-care provider, it's wonderful to involve your child in choosing a gift," Post said. "That may not be appropriate for someone else. Use your discretion when deciding what to do."
For Klinkenberg, the answer is simple. Cash is king. That's because it's customary to tip service people, not professionals -- and they consider the tip a part of their regular income. A Swiss fountain pen is nice, but it doesn't pay the grocery bills.
"Years ago, I had a wonderful relationship with the doorman in my building, who would always stop and talk to me after I came in from the opera. He enjoyed the opera as much as I did, and I thought it would be a nice gesture to give him opera recordings that Christmas," Klinkenberg said. "When I gave them to him, he looked completely confused -- and our relationship was never the same afterward."
Whatever you choose to do, Post stressed that the most important thing you can do when giving a holiday tip is to give the person a word of thanks. "Above all, don't forget to say thank you when you give them the tip. It's a token of appreciation."
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