Gizmos for Bozos
By David Futrelle

(MONEY Magazine) – Convinced that the world revolves around you--or, at least, that it should? Several controversial new devices enable the self-absorbed consumer to make life a little more like The Truman Show, only without all the Jim Carrey scene-stealing. --DAVID FUTRELLE

MEAN GREEN Tired of waiting at intersections? The Mobile InfraRed Transmitter (themirt.com), a cheap knockoff of devices used by emergency vehicles, can turn pesky red lights to green. The maker won't sell to "unauthorized" personnel, but other online vendors aren't so picky: You can snag one for $400.

CELL-FISH Silence those annoying cell-phone gabbers with a cellular jammer--a gizmo that causes all cell phones within 30 feet or so to suddenly go dead. Can you hear me now? Don't think so. Let's just hope no one's dialing 911. The device is illegal to use, but readily available online for $300 to $400.

KNEE, MYSELF AND I Need more legroom on the red-eye to L.A.? Clip the Knee Defender to your tray apparatus and--presto!--the seat in front of it will have to stay in the upright position for the length of the flight. As will the person in that seat. Glad you aren't him! It costs $14.95 at Kneedefender.com.