(MONEY Magazine) – The impulse to compare yourself with others is only natural. As a kid, you measured the size of your doll or model-car collection against your friends'; in high school, you tallied up the number of pairs of designer jeans you owned vs. the coolest kid in school.

Now, as an adult, you probably find yourself wondering how you compare with others financially. Are you the only one who can't seem to stick to a budget? How does your 401(k) balance measure up to other thirtysomethings'? Is your kid going to be the only one who has to borrow money to pay for college?

In this story, we'll help you find out where you really stand against others your age. Meet the Medians--a fictional family that represents the absolute middle ground in earning, borrowing, saving and spending habits. In this case, a little curiosity is a good thing: Knowing how you stack up can help you get a clearer picture of your financial weaknesses and strengths while showing whether you're falling behind.

On that note, a word of caution: The Medians don't always do the right thing. As a whole, Americans don't save enough, and we rack up far too much credit-card debt. So rather than take comfort in being average, you should use the numbers in this story as the minimum for where you need to be. In general, the more you beat Medians, the better. On the pages that follow, you will find worksheets to measure where you are now, as well as tools and strategies to help you get ahead.

Medians in their twenties and early thirties are tech-savvy but financially unseasoned. Few have stocks, funds or life insurance. More than half don't own a home. But those with retirement savings have most of it in stocks. That's good.

Save, save, save. Sign up for a 401(k) or open an IRA. Aim to put aside at least 10% of your pay.

Buy stocks. Invest 90% of your long-term funds in stocks; with a far-off time horizon, you can handle volatility.

Stick to a budget. Track your spending (banking online makes that easier) and keep a lid on debt. Borrow for a home, but don't fund your lifestyle with a credit card.

Having had little time to save, 25- to 34-year-olds are just starting to build wealth; millionaires are a relative rarity.

$45,000

NOTES: Net worth and income are median per household for ages 25 to 34. Investments are for ages 35 and under. SOURCES: Claritas Market Audit Survey, 2003; Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001.

Millionaire households 211,000

NOTE: Under age 35. SOURCE: Boston College Center on Wealth and Philanthropy.

More than 70% of people under 35 say easy credit makes it tempting to overspend. The credit-card and late-payment figures below bear that out.

% of income

iPods 9%

yes 12%

NOTES: Savings and credit data for those under 35; iPod ownership for those 18 to 24. Bills past due for 60 days or more. SOURCES: Money/ICR telephone poll of 1,019 Americans, Feb. 11-15 (margin of error is 3.1 percentage points); Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001; Demos; Jupiter; Dieringer Research American Interactive Consumer Survey.

The typical 401(k) plan participant age 25 to 34 has amassed $12,067.

NOTES: Allocations for investors in their twenties. Fixed income includes bonds and stable-value funds. SOURCE: Employee Benefits Research Institute.

A house, children, more bills: From their mid-thirties to early forties, the Medians are acquiring more responsibilities and financial headaches. Medians of this age spend more than any other group on food and entertainment, and they have the highest credit-card balances.

Rein in spending. The additional financial burden of a home and kids means that you may have to give up some little extras to meet your major financial goals.

Keep your hands off your retirement. Almost 20% of 401(k) investors in their forties have plan loans. Remember: You have to repay that loan with after-tax dollars. If you change jobs, avoid the temptation to cash out; roll over the money into an IRA or your new 401(k).

Fund retirement first, then college. It's only natural to want to help your kids, but you can't take out loans for retirement.

Protect your family. Anyone with dependents should have a will, as well as life and disability insurance. If you have kids under 18, your will should name a guardian.

Be smart about debt. If you have a mortgage, use the calculator at money.com/refinancing to see if a new loan would save you money.

Wealth skyrockets after age 35, and income goes up 20% from the previous decade. Stock and fund ownership rises too.

$55,000

NOTES: All data for ages 35 to 44; net worth and income are median per household. SOURCES: Claritas Market Audit Survey, 2003; Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001.

Millionaire households 1 mil.

NOTE: Ages 35 to 44. SOURCE: Boston College Center on Wealth and Philanthropy.

Blame the kids? Not only are the Medians spending the most on food (at home and out), fun and clothes, they are also saddled with debt and adding a new demand: college savings.

% of income

NOTES: Savings data for ages 35 to 54; spending for 35 to 44. SOURCES: MONEY/ICR telephone poll of 1,019 Americans, Feb. 11-15 (margin of error is 3.1 percentage points); U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics Consumer Expenditures Survey, 2002.

Credit-card balances are up for these 35- to 44-year-olds. What's more, 57% of them have car, student, furniture or other installment loans, with an average total balance of $11,100. And 17% have borrowed from their 401(k).

yes 43%

21% well, no

NOTES: Debt data for ages 35 to 44; poll and college savings for ages 35 to 49. [1]Includes 7% who responded "Don't know." SOURCES: Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001; Demos; Yankelovich Monitor, 2004; Upromise.

Between ages 35 and 44, home ownership becomes the norm. Not surprisingly, these buyers (many first-time) have yet to build significant equity.

yes 68%

$125K

36%

SOURCE: Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001.

Although the majority of eligible workers in their thirties and forties put something into their 401(k) with every paycheck, few are making the maximum contribution and many are worried about retirement.

yes 77%

$32K

10%

11% yes

yes 19%

no 37% the highest insecurity of any age group

NOTES: Balance and participation rates for eligible workers ages 35 to 44. Savings rates for those in their forties earning $40,000 or more and in plans with employer contributions. Fixed income includes bonds and stable-value funds; 1% is "other." Poll is of 35- to 44-year-olds. SOURCES: Employee Benefits Research Institute; EBRI/American Savings Education Council/Greenwald 2004 Retirement Confidence Survey.

For the Medians, late forties until retirement is a time of peak affluence, high-gear savings and declining debt. Home ownership and home values hit lifetime highs. With more saved for the future, confidence starts to replace doubt.

Set a retirement goal. By now, you can likely estimate how much income you'll need once you stop working. Use the calculator at money.com/retirementplanner to arrive at a dollar goal.

Add more bonds. Gradually increase fixed income to at least 40% of your portfolio. Once a year, check your asset allocation and rebalance if necessary.

Save harder. This is your chance to make a final push for retirement. Workers ages 50 and over can save more in tax-sheltered accounts--as much as $18,000 in a 401(k) and $4,500 in an IRA.

Review your estate plan. A durable power of attorney, living will and health-care proxy will give your family the ability to make financial and health-care decisions on your behalf if you become sick or disabled.

Get the charitable breaks you deserve. Not only are your donations deductible, but so are some volunteer expenses.

Income tops out in the 45-to-54 age group. Net worth, on the other hand, keeps growing until retirement.

$67,500

NOTES: Net worth and income are median per household; investment and income data for ages 45 to 54; SOURCES: Claritas Market Audit Survey, 2003; Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001.

Millionaire households 3.9 mil.

NOTE: Ages 45 to 64. SOURCE: Boston College Center on Wealth and Philanthropy.

The Medians golf, garden and spruce up their homes. Financial maturity is setting in. Debt is better under control than during the previous decade, and more Medians have life insurance and wills.

% of income

31% golf equipment

$1,827 annual average

8 hours monthly average

NOTES: Savings data for ages 55 and older; charity for 4o to 49; golf spending for 45 to 64. SOURCES: MONEY/ICR telephone poll of 1,019 Americans, Feb. 11-15 (margin of error is 3.1 percentage points); Independent Sector; U.S. Census Bureau Statistical Abstract of the United States, 2003.

By this age, the Medians are getting smarter about borrowing and money management. Credit-card debt is edging down, fewer people have loans, and refis are up (16% of 50- to 64-year-olds did one in the past year).

yes 37%

21% well, no

yes 63%

yes 55%

NOTES: Debt data for ages 45 to 54; poll is ages 35 to 49. Insurance data are for those 45 and older; will data are for those 55 to 64. SOURCES: Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001; Demos; Yankelovich Monitor, 2004; Jupiter; AARP.

During these years, equity builds. Below is where 45- to 54-year-old Medians stand; those 10 years older have an average 58% in home equity.

yes 76%

$135K

44%

SOURCE: Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001.

IRA and 401(k) participation is highest in these years. Below is the average balance for 45- to 54-year-olds. By ages 55 to 64, it stands at $53K. And nearly 20% of 401(k) savers in their sixties max out.

yes 72%

$45K

11%

15% yes

yes 25%

yes 51% the highest security of any age group

NOTES: Balance and participation rates are for eligible workers ages 45 to 54. Savings rates are for those in their fifties earning $40,000 or more and in plans with employer contributions. Fixed income includes bonds and stable-value funds; 1% is "other." Poll is of ages 45 to 54. SOURCES: Employee Benefits Research Institute; EBRI/American Savings Education Council/Greenwald 2004 Retirement Confidence Survey.

After the Medians stop working, they have more time to devote to travel and charity. Their investment approach is more conservative, and debt is less of a problem. But health-care costs become a bigger drag on their income.

Tap your savings slowly. If you take out more than 4% a year, your money is unlikely to last a lifetime.

Hang on to stocks. Investing part of your portfolio in equities--but no more than 40%--will keep it growing even as you draw it down.

Plan for long-term care. The average nursing home costs $55,000 a year. Are you prepared? After age 65, long-term-care insurance premiums rise substantially.

As retirees stop getting a paycheck and start tapping their savings, their net worth understandably shrinks.

$32,500

NOTES: Net worth and income are median per household for ages 65 and older; investment data for ages 65 to 74. SOURCES: Claritas Market Audit Survey, 2003; Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001.

Millionaire households 2.3 mil.

NOTE: Ages 65 and older. SOURCE: Boston College Center on Wealth and Philanthropy.

Retirees are conservative spenders and investors (they are most likely to own CDs). Yet debt hobbles the 30% with credit-card balances.

yes 83%

4.7% of total income

2.4 per year

NOTES: Asset and home data for ages 65 to 74; travel for 58 and older; charity and debt for 65 and older; trips are five nights or more. SOURCES: Federal Reserve Survey of Consumer Finances, 2001; Independent Sector; Yesawich Pepperdine Brown & Russell; Bureau of Labor Statistics Consumer Expenditures Survey, 2002; Demos.

Social Security covers 44% of retiree income. The second biggest source: pensions.

NOTES: [1] Includes employment, VA benefits and sale of a home or business. [2] Includes pensions. SOURCE: EBRI/American Savings Education Council/Greenwald 2003 Retirement Confidence Survey.