NEW YORK (CNN/Money) - With the allure of the diamond ring, the saying of "I do" and the honeymoon, it's easy for altar-bound couples to ignore the fact that they are joining together two financial lives.

If you and your partner don't take time to address the issue, money and relationship problems can arise down the road. That's why discussing your financial goals and mishaps, while not romantic, is necessary.

For help getting started, here are today's five tips.

Many couples can talk about religion, sex, and what they are going to name their kids. But often they're far less open about money, which is frequently cited as a reason for divorce.

In fact, according to a recent Smart Money/Redbook survey of married or cohabiting adults, 36 percent of men and 40 percent of women admitted they had lied to their spouse about what something they bought had cost.

"(M)any couples get married and don't understand each other's spending and saving styles. Someone may feel comfortable incurring a lot of credit card debt. The other partner may freak if they have to pay interest. It leads to fights. It leads to arguments. So they need to talk about the spending and saving style," said Diane Forden, editor in chief of Bridal Guide Magazine.

Failure to talk about your finances and your money styles is also a failure to plan and to plan effectively. And that's one of the biggest reasons why couples can get into financial trouble.

You should disclose as much as you can to each other, including your salary, debt load, student loans, inheritance, savings and credit status.

Start by having small conversations. Not just one big one. And do it on your leisure time. Don't try to fit it in on the way to work or when you both come home and are exhausted.

The Smart Money/Redbook survey found 64 percent of respondents maintained joint bank accounts, with just 14 percent keeping everything in separate accounts and another 18 percent using both.

Figure out as a couple what your joint expenses are as well as how you want to save and how you want to spend your money.

If you are a younger couple without a lot of assets, a joint account can work well. This let's you build together from the ground up. Jeff Opdyke, author of "Love & Money," calls this "financial intimacy."

But if you're an older couple or going into a second marriage, separate accounts may make sense. You both may already have successful careers and financial systems set up that you want to keep intact. This is also a good option if one partner has credit card debt that the other doesn't want to absorb.

CNNfn's Gerri Willis shares five tips on mixing marriage and money. Play video (Real or Windows Media)

Keep in mind that while separate accounts may be yours, you still want to share your financial information with your partner.

A third option is to have a joint account for some expenses (joint savings and living expenses) and separate accounts for individual spending money. For instance, you could both agree to put 10 percent of your income in personal accounts and put the remainder in the shared pot.

Five or 10 years into your marriage, your money concerns are likely to be different from those you had when you walked down the aisle.

That's why, in addition to monthly money meetings with your spouse to keep abreast of near-term financial issues, you should discuss your big money picture at least once a year.

Make sure your retirement plans mesh. If one's 401(k) is invested solely in high-risk funds, the other partner may want to diversify more.

Make sure, too, that you're still aware of each other's desires and goals – from taking vacations or buying a home to having children.

And take time to discuss the "what ifs." What if one partner loses his or her job? What if one wants to go back to school? What if someone gets a job in another part of the country? Will the other spouse be willing to pack up and move?

To think the man is the sole breadwinner is so last century. Most couples who marry are dual-career couples, and it's no longer uncommon to find couples where a woman makes more money than her husband.

Whatever your situation, don't buy into the notion that money equals power in a marriage, Opdyke said. He points out that while some men have no trouble with their wives earning more, others resent what they see as a loss of power.

On the other hand, if you're the partner with the nice pay package, you might feel you deserve certain privileges.

Remember, marriage is a team effort. So keep an open line of communication with your spouse to discuss your expectations and fears.

There are some topics that nobody likes to talk about but that need to be discussed, especially when children are involved.

First and foremost, make sure you have a will. If you don't make a will before your death, state law will determine who gets your property, or worse yet, even raise your children.

Opdyke also recommends a woman have at least one credit card in her name. The reason: if a couple divorces, it will be easier for her to re-establish credit on her own.

Finally, talk about a prenuptial agreement if one of you has kids or you're entering a marriage where one partner has a great deal more in assets than the other.  

Gerri Willis is the personal finance editor for CNN Business News. Willis also is co-host of CNNfn's The FlipSide, weekdays from 11 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. (ET). E-mail comments to 5tips@cnnfn.com.