Dear Annie:
I've been really miserable in my job at an investment bank for several months now -- ever since my department got a new boss who is a real snake -- but I've put off quitting until after I got my annual bonus for 2004, which I should receive this week. So now what? Should I write a formal letter of resignation? If my boss isn't around, as is often the case, can I just give it to his assistant? I've never quit a job before, but I'm sure there's a right (and a wrong) way to do it.
-- Onward in '05

Dear Onward:
Ah, the annual bonus-season stampede to the exits! What would Wall Street be without it? Note to job seekers: People who take the bonus and run create some interesting opportunities at this time of year. As for how to quit, yes, there is a right way and a wrong way -- or more accurately, lots of wrong ways. Handing a letter of resignation to your boss's assistant would be one of them. Says Dave Hardie, managing director of executive search firm Herbert Mines Associates, "Resign in person. This is too important to handle any other way. Don't use the phone unless it's physically impossible to meet, and don't even think about e-mail or voicemail." There's no science to the timing, Hardie says, but "morning seems best, or maybe lunchtime. This isn't a surprise you want to spring at the end of a long day."

After you've spoken to your boss, hand him a signed letter of resignation. "Although it is the least important part of the process, it establishes your end date," notes Hardie. "And it remains in your personnel file." Because this letter becomes part of the permanent record of your employment at this company, it should be short and if not sweet, then, at least not bitter. Keep it brief and reasonably upbeat something like: "I am resigning from XYZ Corp. effective (insert date here), which is two weeks from today. In the meantime, I will work to transition my responsibilities smoothly and productively." That assumes, of course, that you're willing to do that. Then say something like: "I appreciate the professional and personal growth opportunities provided during my time here. I'm proud of the things we have accomplished, and I wish you and the company continued success in the future." Obviously, your opinion of your boss's reptilian qualities need not be mentioned.

What if your employer makes you a counteroffer, holding out more money or even a promotion, if you stay? "It can be flattering," says Hardie, "but there are three problems. First, where was that raise or that promotion before? Is the company truly acting in your best interest, or have they just realized it will be inconvenient, and probably expensive, to replace you?" The second problem is, if you do take the counteroffer, "Things are never the same. Quitting once suggests you'll do it again someday. You'll be watched more suspiciously, and you may not be part of the long-term plan." And third, let's face it: If you're miserable enough now to quit, how likely is it that more money, or a fancier title, will change that?

Watch what you say about quitting. Word gets around, Hardie notes, so if you've told your boss you're leaving to take a great new job, don't tell your co-workers that you're fleeing because the boss is a creep. "Stick to your story, and keep it positive," Hardie says. "At the exit interview, you can suggest ways to improve, but don't 'flame' your boss." And do take the time to say good-bye. "You've shared many experiences with the people in this company, and some of them may have taught you a lot. So let them know where you're going, mention your good memories, and say 'thank you,' " suggests Hardie. "It's the right thing to do -- and it's a small world. You may work with some of them again someday, and you may want them to be references for you in the future."

-------------------------------------------------------

Next, see FORTUNE's 100 Best Companies to Work For.

Find the best employers in your state.

Got a question or comment? E-mail me here.