(FORTUNE Magazine) – Ever since no-fault divorce laws removed the need to gather dirt, matrimonial attorneys, as they are known, have enjoyed increased respectability. The best evidence is their sleek, skyscraper offices decorated in Englishmen's club style. Raoul Felder's 30th-floor Manhattan aerie even has a nonworking fireplace, though the effect is somewhat spoiled by a lavender neon sign on the wall: SUE SOMEONE YOU LOVE. So tony has matrimonial law become that it has its own secret society. An exclusive group of 30 or so attorneys from all over the country belong to the Matrimonial Network and come together once a year at a conference center in Troutbeck, New York, to swap war stories and referrals. Known among themselves as the Dirty 30, ''they are admittedly self-selected as the best in the land,'' says Emily Couric, author of The Divorce Lawyers. The chosen agree not + to acknowledge their membership publicly -- but it does tend to slip out in an interview. The best way to begin your search is to ask your family lawyer for referrals or query divorced friends who feel that, on balance, their experience was good. (If they start frothing about how poorly they were represented, ask for the name of their spouse's lawyer.) Then make appointments with two or three attorneys for a consultation. This will probably cost you their hourly fee -- $250 to $350 usually, but $450 is not unheard of -- and it's money well spent. One side benefit: Your soon-to-be ex cannot hire any lawyer with whom you have discussed your case unless you give the attorney permission. Once you have found someone you think you can get along with, ask a few questions. Begin with ''How long will this take?'' The answer is likely to be ''I don't know,'' but the parameters will be laid out for you. In a simple divorce, where people genuinely want to settle, plan on a year; for a contested, complicated case, expect at least two years -- and two years beyond that if there are appeals. Some cases seem to go on as long as the Hundred Years' War. Real estate developer Daniel M. Galbreath and his wife, Elizabeth, wrangled for nine years before finally cutting the knot in 1991. Business First, a weekly newspaper in Columbus, Ohio, reports that he had personally guaranteed some bank loans on properties, and when the real estate market fell apart in the late 1980s, separating the Galbreath business interests from the Galbreath marital interests was a nightmare. Says Manhattan attorney Peter Bronstein: ''If you want to make the lawyers rich, drag it out.'' The Galbreaths enriched theirs by over $1 million. Your next question should be ''How much will this cost?'' You'll get the same answer -- ''I don't know'' -- but given the time parameters the lawyer has laid out, you should be able to make an educated guess. One high-ranking executive who earns about $400,000 a year reports that she paid $23,000 to her lawyer in 1991, the year she filed for divorce; $16,000 in 1992; ''and I'm budgeting $25,000 for this year.'' She and her husband have less than $1 million in assets to squabble over. Figure on $20,000 to $50,000, unless the case goes to trial. Then you'll likely be into the low six digits as your lawyer charges for days spent in the courthouse and nights spent preparing witnesses. You will be asked for a retainer when a lawyer accepts your case. It should be refundable if you and yours decide to reconcile before it's used up. That's just the levy on you. If you are the partner with the high income, you may have to pick up a portion of your ex's fees. Your lawyer might also be thinking about a bonus on top of his hourly rate. Reputable attorneys don't blush to request them, though their voices sink a bit when they discuss bonuses with reporters. Says Angelo T. Cometa, past president of the New York State Bar Association: ''Depending on the case, we might put in your retainer agreement that at the conclusion we may ask you to pay an additional fee based on what we achieved for you or the time in which we achieved it.'' He stresses, though, that clients should always be told about such arrangements before they sign on. One lawyer represented a man said to be worth $500 million in a complicated international divorce for which the total hourly fees alone ran over $200,000. ''I felt I had done such a good job for him that I was entitled to a bonus,'' the lawyer recalled. '' 'How much?' my client asked. I said I thought $100,000 was appropriate.'' The man paid promptly, free at last -- free at last!