(FORTUNE Magazine) – Bill Clinton will leave office in a mere eight months, and he told the White House Correspondents' Association dinner last month that his staff has been sending him tips on resume writing. "They really seem to be up on this stuff," he said in mock amazement. But seriously: What's a former President to do? He could write a book, join corporate boards, or travel the world as ambassador at large. Knowing this peripatetic soon-to-be 54-year-old, he'll probably do all of that and more.

We have another idea: As quotes from the dinner show, Clinton arguably bested one of the top comedians, NBC's Jay Leno. Even Leno was impressed, telling him, "You'd be a great comic." Exactly! Why not give Clinton Leno's spot on The Tonight Show? The President may not have always been a standup guy, but he's a first-rate standup comedian.

--Jeffrey H. Birnbaum

BILL CLINTON

ON THE VICE PRESIDENT Now, look at this photo. It's a recent one of the Vice President applauding one of my policy initiatives. But look a little closer: Those are not his hands.

ON LEAVING OFFICE Being realistic, [upon leaving the White House] I would consider an executive position with another country. Of course, I prefer to stay within the G-8.

ON THE REPUBLICANS [McCain] just made a difficult journey back to a place where he endured unspeakable abuse at the hands of his oppressors--the Senate Republican caucus.

ON HIS STANDUP COMPETITION No matter how mean [Leno] is to me, I just love this guy, because together we give hope to gray-haired, chunky baby-boomers everywhere.

JAY LENO

[ON THE VICE PRESIDENT] Mr. President, that was a fine, fine speech, although Al Gore said he would have handled it differently.

[ON LEAVING OFFICE] One day you're almost President [referring to Bob Dole], the next day you have erectile dysfunction? You [Clinton] may be sadder about leaving office than you thought.

[ON THE REPUBLICANS] I didn't enjoy seeing McCain and Bush attack each other... Remember the glory days of the Republican Party, when they were all united against the poor and minorities?

[ON HIS STANDUP COMPETITION] Mr. President, there is no one sadder that you're leaving than I am. You bought my house. You bought my cars. Everything I have I owe to you.