(FORTUNE Magazine) – The Fortune 500

Mountains of crisp green cash flowing in cool cascades trickling down, right? Sure.

The Top Ten

Retail, cars, and oil, IBM and Sandy Weill. So what else is new?

Wal-Mart Is No. 1

Hail to the Queen Bee whose drones direct the rotund to fairly priced guns

Microsoft Rules

Twelve percent sales growth, wowsers. Thomas Penfield who? Browse this, Your Honor!

Overheard at Viacom

Mel and Sumner and Sumner and Mel and Sumner and Mel and Sumner

WorldCom Fell Off the List

Look! Up in the sky! What a pretty parachute for Mr. Ebbers!

AOL Time Warner

What is the sound of one hundred billion dollars gurgling down the tubes?

Tyson Moves From No. 177 to No. 72

Free trade or free range, there will always be chicken to feather your nest

Martha Stewart! What's Up With That?

Perfect bundt. Perfect ham. Perfect inside-trading scam. And down goes Sam.

Upgrade From Smith Barney

See baby Grubman. See one hand wash the other. Look, Ma! New preschool!

Berkshire Hathaway Brings Home the Bacon

Warren is smarter. Warren knows the score, even when there is no score

Yum Brands Is No. 240

You gotta love 'em. Up twenty-seven slots. Why? 'Cause they're so yummy

And Congratulations to No. 501 Bed Bath & Beyond. Coming Soon to the List!

How do they do it? Today my wife will return yet another towel