Fast-food sandwich chain Quiznos launches its new Philly cheesesteak with a TV commercial featuring two businessmen eating lunch alfresco. One's a smart Quiznos customer; the other, a non-Q loser.

"Were you raised by wolves?" asks appalled Guy No. 1. Yes, indeed - and he still calls the wolf den home. Cut to a shot of Guy No. 2 lying on the ground and suckling a mama wolf's teat.