(MONEY Magazine) – When flights are canceled or hotels are overbooked, it's now often up to travelers to find alternatives. ''With all the airline mergers and consolidation,'' says Watts Wacker, at Yankelovich Clancy Shulman, market researchers, ''staffs that should serve you are not being trained as well. You must frequently marshal your own resources.'' To smooth your rites of passage, then, and ensure terrific deals and service, we asked industry insiders -- hotel managers, globe-hopping executives, travel agents, convention planners, airline analysts -- for their favorite strategies. Their tips:

Handling hotels -- Check in European-style: Ask to see your room before registering. If you don't like it, request another. -- Inquire about free hotel services. ''Our business guests use the complimentary limo to Wall Street,'' explains John Power at the U.N. Plaza- Park Hyatt in New York City. ''But weekend guests who go shopping or to the theater rarely take the car.'' Usually, you don't know about such breaks unless you ask. -- Get away off-season. In the Caribbean, the weather during April and May is great and the savings substantial. For example: high-season rates (December through March) at the 285-room Hyatt Regency St. John (800-233-1234) are $295 a room. The tab drops to $215 from April 19 to May 30 and then to $155 in the summer. -- Safeguard your trip with the right insurance (see the box on page 168). But if promised services are not delivered, complain right away. If you're still unhappy after the trip, write to the president of the airline or hotel. Says Roger Sonnabend, CEO of the Sonesta International hotel chain: ''I don't hear from guests often, but when I do, I respond immediately.'' -- If you want to extend a hotel stay over a weekend, try to negotiate a lower rate. -- For special service, return to hotels you've stayed at before. Most maintain extensive guest histories. Frequent-guest programs -- usually free to join -- also provide useful extras. Members of Omni Select Guest (800-367-6664), for instance, get their own reservations line and late checkouts. -- If you're told upon arrival that the hotel has no rooms, says Jeanine Moss of the New York City Convention and Visitors Bureau, try: ''I always stay here. What do you suggest?'' Hotels often find rooms in other hotels.

Acing airlines -- When flights are delayed or canceled, don't bother waiting in line with stranded passengers. Book another flight by immediately calling the airline or your travel agent from an airport phone. -- Ask about requirements for special situations. For example, if you're seven or more months pregnant and want to fly, the airline may allow it with a doctor's note. -- Arrive early, even if you hold a boarding pass. Reservations are routinely thrown out of airline computers 10 minutes before departures for domestic flights and 30 minutes before international ones. If you haven't checked in, your seat can be given away. -- Arrange for escorts for kids traveling alone, including layovers, by asking for ''unaccompanied minor escort service.'' The service, though often free, may cost as much as $35. -- Be flexible to get the lowest fare, advises Morton Ehrlich at Lifeco, a travel management firm. Ehrlich's format: ''What is the lowest fare charged from here to Oshkosh? Is it available on Feb. 29 at 11 a.m.? If not, is it available on an earlier or later flight that day?'' -- Children over two years old generally pay 60% to 80% of a full-fare ticket. % But a discounted adult ticket is often cheaper.

Greasing rental wheels -- Compare auto insurance coverage provided by credit-card issuers and charge the rental car on the best one. -- Be careful about booking cars in Europe. Compacts are much smaller there, and if you switch reservations, you may get a surcharge of about $100. Drop- off charges run as high as $200. And local taxes can add another 20% to the bill. -- Think about renting a car on Thursday afternoons. That's when lower weekend rates often kick in.

Pick prize packages -- This summer's value is travel in Europe, including the East bloc countries. Says Ed Brill, vice president of SRS Hotels: ''The flurry of travelers who visited after the Wall came down is over. Hotels that never offered discounts are now more flexible about package rates.'' Rooms at the Diplomat (800-777-5848) in Stockholm are $176 each, down from $289. At the Thermal Hotel Helia (800-777-5848) in Budapest, you pay $66 per person per night, down from $84 last July. -- Call a travel agent to book resort vacations, such as in the Caribbean or Hawaii. ''Agents can put together land and air deals for about 25% less than booking independently,'' says Sonesta's Roger Sonnabend. For example: Liberty Travel (800-582-7411) is promoting a seven-day trip to the 196-room Four Seasons Resort on Nevis, including round-trip air fare from the East Coast, for $1,746 a person (double occupancy) -- a $263 saving compared with the cost of reserving it yourself. -- Smart frequent fliers book a cruise and then redeem mileage by flying to the cruise's departing city. Most cruise lines bill air fare and ship charges separately. -- Buy packages for exclusive entree. For example: Sports Tours (800-722-7701) runs four- and five-day stays at summer baseball games, with accommodations at official team hotels, for between $575 and $695. Norwegian Cruise Lines (800-327-7030) offers trips featuring sports personalities, including NBC's Dick Enberg and Bob Costas and National Football League players. Last, when you do run into snags and snafus -- as we all do -- stay calm and, above all, courteous. Flight attendants say that when every traveler has the same problem, they make time for the ones who say ''Please.''