How to confront a distracting coworker

Ask FSB

Get small-business intelligence from the experts. Here's a chance for YOU to ask your pressing small-business questions, and FSB editors will help you get answers from the appropriate experts.

Your name:

* Your e-mail address:

* Your city:

* Your state:
Select Outside U.S. Alabama Alaska Arizona Arkansas California Colorado Connecticut Delaware Dist. of Columbia Florida Georgia Hawaii Idaho Illinois Indiana Iowa Kansas Kentucky Louisiana Maine Maryland Massachusetts Michigan Minnesota Mississippi Missouri Montana Nebraska Nevada New Hampshire New Jersey New Mexico New York North Carolina North Dakota Ohio Oklahoma Oregon Pennsylvania Rhode Island South Carolina South Dakota Tennessee Texas Utah Vermont Virginia Washington West Virginia Wisconsin Wyoming

* Your daytime phone #:

* Your questions:

More from FSB

Help wanted for HR firm A CEO and rodeo queen King of the mountain bike

Current Issue

(FORTUNE Small Business) -- Dear FSB: I work in a small office and my co-worker eats sunflower seeds all day and it's distracting. I've talked to the office manager, who hates confrontation, but she is reluctant to do anything. What should I do?

- Sydney, Aurora, Colo.

Dear Sydney: Dealing with a co-worker's annoying habit can be uncomfortable. Whether you decide to confront her directly or seek guidance from a higher-up, don't ignore the situation - especially if it's affecting your job performance.

If possible, confront your co-worker directly, but in private, says Colleen A. Rickenbacher, president of Colleen Rickenbacher, Inc. and author of Be on Your Best Business Behavior. This is a matter for the co-worker to handle, not human resources, she says.

"She's eating sunflower seeds and not stealing office equipment or embezzling funds," says Rickenbacher. "Those are situations human resources handles."

If you're uncomfortable approaching her and the office manager has refused, you will need to approach a higher-up because resolving this conflict is the office manager's job, says Rickenbacher.

Ideally, if a manager is conflict adverse, he should go to human resources and ask how to handle the employee, says Paul Gibson, the Vice President of Human Resources at Mattamy Homes.

If you decide to initiate a conversation remember that you don't want to offend your co-worker, but want to resolve the problem. Rickenbacher suggests beginning the conversation with a positive comment; such as, "I like sunflower seeds also" and then explain that when she eats the seeds at her desk all day it's a distraction. End the conversation by offering a suggestion that will resolve the situation such as that she use the office kitchen or the conference room to enjoy her snack. It's important that the conversation ends on a positive note to avoid further or later conflict between yourself and your co-worker.

Hartman suggests that when initiating conversation that you avoid telling your co-worker what to do. Don't tell her to stop eating the sunflower seeds at her desk, he says. Instead, let her know how the constant eating and noise is making you feel. Starting the conversation with a story about how you didn't realize one of your own bad office habits was creating problems may make it easier for your co-worker to relate to you instead of feeling attacked.